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July 30 ack!I'm doing a 5k on Sunday. Local, Redmond community kinda thing. So - no alcohol until Monday night. Am I freaking crazy?! July 27 Re-EntryMY quadrant: Controlling Analyzer
MY core wound: That I won't be heard MY definition of success: Creativity, Freedom and Power
MY stand: Feisty Stubborn Goddess
MY question: Where is life in this choice?
MY point? The only wayI'm going to change things is to take control. I'm the one accountable. What was I thinking?In about 12 minutes we are leaving for a Reading class we signed A up for. A 5-week, 1.25 hour event that is supposed to introduce reading as fun and a jump into Kindergarten. With pencils. But every Sunday? What the hell was I smoking?
I'm glad we are taking A to this. We were talking at the breakfast table about how important it is to know how to read regardless of what path you choose in life. If you are a "reader/writer", math, art, even an engineer needs to know how to read. A loves to be read TO. And she loves to page through books and recite from memory the story - or make one up on her own. She just gets all sorts of stressed out when we try to help her recognize words, sound things out, etc. She doesn't allow herself the grace to learn things slowly, to practice and make mistakes and do it right the next time (or the 5th time). The writing is on the wall, my 5-year old is already the perfectionist mess that her mother has become. July 26 early morningsIs 7:33am truly that early? I think so, when you really only got 6 hours of sleep, or was it 5? My stressed afternoon turned out rather nicely. Althought Sears didn't come, they are promised early this morning. I went to my team picnic. It probably helped that while driving to get A - I blared Radiohead really loudly with my windows down. Loud music and open windows (driving fast if possible) really help calm me down. The picnic was nice. A made some new friends. Home for some relaxations, some G&T, quality time with the husband, good conversation with a friend. Yep. All and all a good day. July 25 WTF dayI'm getting more and more annoyed as the day wears on...
I'm sitting at home working. Well, except for right now. WAITING for Sears repair to come and look at my broken dryer. I called and they cannot give me a better window than 1-5pm. AND - the driver is supposed to call an hour before arriving. It's now 3, so my plan to get out early to my team's picnic is now freaking shot. And you all know that the person won't be able to fix it now. There will be some part they have to order from east-jibip that will take 2 weeks to arrive. So I'll either be hanging a line outside (screw the homeowners association) or I'll be dragging my laundry to a friends house. Frick!
THEN...I spent a good amount of my Saturday afternoon last weekend cleaning out the garage. Creating 6 big lawn bags full of donations, plus some small applicances in boxes. I dragged all that shit out to the curb this morning. Attached the NEON card to it. Sitting here on the couch I look outside and see the freaking truck drive RIGHT by my hosue on the way out of the neighborhood. WTF?!
This day better take an up-turn soon. Or I'll need to be heavily medicated tonight. July 24 opportunityI had an informational this afternoon (for those lucky few outside MSFT - that is a pre-interview for candidate and manager) for a job that sounds very exciting. And scary at the same time. It is a rather large job, with lots of exposure, responsibility and fabulous opportunity. It's nearly paralyzing. I've been wanting out of my current job for almost a year. Due to my org stuff. I love my partners right now, and when doing my actual job without the politics, I really like it! So why would I leave a job when I love it? I have this nagging voice in the back of my head...."only leave a relationship when it is working"...for any of your Context-heads. Crap!! July 23 too long!Boy - it's been a long time since I posted. Based on my last entry, I can now say I'm in the Obama support camp.
Otherwise, I need to update more regularly (inspired by Geeky Mama - thank you). All these perfect moments, thoughts and arguments that I want to capture... Yet I have a retention of a sieve if I don't write it down. Which is why Reqall is so freaking cool!! May 27 Reproductive RightsI have come out a Hillary supporter. But if she doesn't get the nomination, I'll be voting for Barack.
What I'm doing here is getting out the word on McCain's reproductive rights stand. I'm providing this as information. As women, whether you agree with pro-choice or not, this is important information - because it isn't all about abortion. There are women's health issues wrapped up on here too.
Please - make an informed decision May 20 Carbon Footprints (1)How freakin' cool is this?!?! My employer (otherwise known as Microsoft) is instituting the following Green steps:
Again - I ask - how FREAKING COOL?!?!
May 08 random observationsIs it just me? Or do Andrew Farriss of INXS and Chief Tyrol look like the same person? When did Sesame Street start podcasting? What a neat way to occupy a child for a few minutes. And introduce them to technology. Although, knowing my daughter, we should give her a Zune in a padded room so it doesn't drop and smash into pieces. Love her - child has butter fingers. For those of us with paper fetishes, moleskine engraved books?! Although I cannot justify spending $20 to get a jar of "fresh from the factory" Reese cups (and please don't indulge me, I will eat the entire container in one sitting)...fresh Twizzlers is RIGHT up my alley! April 25 5 years!A is 5 today. 5!!! When did my little baby age 5 years? So much has transpired over the last 5 years. Children and their development is amazing. I have one of the most compassionate and neurotic chidren I've met. She loves Mommy & Daddy, our cat, her friends, Hello Kit-tee, My Little Pony, mazes, tic tac toe, reading, singing, acting, Baby Julia, Dan Zanes, treats, Fraggle Rock, taking pictures, making movies, cooking with Norman, baking with me, calling her grandparents, play dates, the Zoo....I really could go on and on...my girl loves life!
Today is the first day in a long time that I've felt great! It's unnerving. Today is day-5 of my full cocktail strength Anti-D's. I got up and ran this morning (as hard as it was to drag my ass out of bed at 5am and into that cold morning), A and I went to PCC and got breakfast and cupcakes for her class, I got in, been productive up until this point, have a plan laid out for the rest of the day... I don't trust it. Too new. Will come crashing down at any point... It was a really rough week for me, I had a headache that lasted from Monday night until this morning (maybe that's why I'm so jazzed). I'm pretty sure these headaches of late are migraines. I don't want to go to the doctor. Why?! If they can help prescribe treatment, why not make it better. I still have fear of moving forward. It's so comfortable where I sit today. I bring this up given my life the past few months, I look at my child, and see all that innocence and possibility. Instead of being afraid of how she'll twist that into whatever her issues will be, I'm finding peace there. Trying to figure out how to cultivate that in her. Keep is stronger.
Shortly I'm off to get juice boxes for the party tomorrow and a Hello Kit-tee balloon (shh - it's a secret)
Enjoy your Friday, I'm sure enjoying mine. April 23 Talking about Couch-potato culture may cut our lives short - Buying Time?- msnbc.comIs this really news? Couldn't we see this coming? Couch-potato culture may cut our lives short - Buying Time?- msnbc.com You should take a look at this map on CNN charting obesity rates over the last 20 years. That is an eye opener! April 20 Sunday ThoughtsI've noticed that the last few entries have been links or references to web articles. I haven't been saying much about me or my life lately. I've been using the excuse a lot that I spend so much time on my work laptop, that doing anything personal is so unattractive. Boy is that a lame excuse. If I want to email or send a funny or whatever, you bet your ass I'm online! (sick obsession with Perez Hilton each day - it's like I'm a junky) I send emails, I procrastinate, I search the web for gorgeous paper products that I really don't need to be bringing into my house.
Not sure if there is something exact on my mind tonight. A few things in short sequence...
I've been ramping up on my anti-D's for almost 5 months now. My rules were (1) I don't want to gain weight and (2) don't impact my sex drive (some would say "what sex drive?" - and that would be me) So I started with one, got it up where Dr G wanted it to be. But it wasn't enough, life still felt arduous and well, shitty. So I'm now on a cocktail. (you bet I wish it were a different cocktail) and still ramping up on drug #2. Do I feel better? Yes. Have I gained weight? Yes (although I attritbute that to being back on The Pill) Do I have a sex drive? No. ... More importantly, does day-to-day life feel like a chore? No. I'm actually enjoying things again. I'm reading. I had been trying to read this thick, intense books. When I sent to San Diego a few weeks ago I picked up a Kathy Reich book. Still not done, very close. It's light reading, but not light enough that I don't feel like I'm reading trash. The point is I'm READING! I'm thinking about a class. Yeah - I know, shit or get off the pot (I hate that phrase, but have a friend's head in my mind's eye and she says this a lot) I'm using the excuse of indecision, of schedule conflicts, of work, of all sort of lame ideas to stop propelling me forward (you know that now this is out there, I know 3 readers that will be on me about that) So, better get on that one.
A's birthday party is this coming weekend (thunder storm! - what the fuck is up with this weather?! it was SNOWING this morning?!) Hello Kit-tee at Pump It Up (I can't type that without thinking Dana Carvey & Kevin Nealon) My little munchkin is going to be 5. 5!! ...sigh... Enough on that.
Last Sunday I spent an hour on the phone with a girl I went to high school with. I found her on Facebook. Very cool to talk with her. I heard about almost everyone from the old neighborhood that I ran with. (we did run, although it was usually away from trouble) Wow the memories it brought back. Like the 20-year reunion next year. It would be so cool to get a bunch of the gang back together. From what I hear, most of them moved to NYC. Some of us got further away. Social Networking, who would've guessed?
I owe two emails to two different friends.
I need to carry around a little notebook with me to jot down ideas of what to write about on here. I need to figure out how to download what I've written here so far. For posterity. Or insane fear of losing these words forever. Hm, that means I could buy some new stationary! (evil laugh that only I can hear, voice of reason shouting - but you already have so many of that exact thing!) Damn voice of reason.
I gotta go finish the laundry. April 14 linky'sHow freaking comfortable do these look? It's like walking on clouds...Lipstick Red, size 9 please
Summer beverage anyone? This would be AMAZING! Especially with some gin. These candles are divine. Although I do have trouble buying them online because you never know... Unless it is a scent you have tried before.
I love the idea of magnetic, chalk walls for A's room. Although, now that I've seen the mess chalk makes on the sidewalk, I think I would opt for just magnetic.
You know what - if you had a butter knife stuck in your head, would you really want to be telling the news media?
Word on the street is Beck and The Watchmen will be at Bumbershoot this year. Oh yeah... March 26 Random thoughtsAmerican Idol:
GEEK! Battlestar Gallactica propaganda Oh lords of great 80's music taped off the radio...send me a mixed tape! You all know I have a paper obsession If you have children. If you love children. If you care about toxics and doing the right (green) thing, tell the governor of WA to respond appropriately.
March 22 plagarism?March 17 Talking about Harry Pitts? The worst baby names of all time - Parenting & Family - TODAYshow.comHarry Pitts? The worst baby names of all time - Parenting & Family - TODAYshow.com
March 05 Ticket UpdateI realized last night that I desperately wanted to go see The Swell Season. And that I would pay a premium for the tickets. So I looked around on some ticket outlets and was looking at $140/ticket for the "worst" seats in the house. You know the ones, all the way back in the balcony that likely requires binoculars - not that the Moore is that large, but anyway... I checked Ebay. 2 tix, on the floor, row F. How freaking amazing?! And I won't disclose how much I paid for both, but will just say it was less than $140/ticket.
I feel a sense of peace now.
Still pissy about the whole "honest" scalping thing...but I'm going to the show so I'm happy. March 04 Ticket RIP OFF!So I really really want to see The Swell Season the end of April when they play in Seattle. It's sold out. Ticket outlets are charging a minimum of $130/ticket for the worst seats in the house. If I wanted decent seats I'd have to spend upwards of $300/ticket. I freaking despise these ticket outlets in OTHER states that buy up tickets and sell for a premium. Sure sure...I understand it's their business and all. But why then do I suffer?! There was a time in my youth when we only bought tickets at a ticket outlet - before the fancy convenience of the internet, phone orders were near impossible. But now, when I can actually afford to pay a premium for tickets, well it just pisses me off!!! Anyone out in the Seattle area wanting to sell me two tickets? hahaha...didn't think so... |
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